Jargon in the Jungle

Before we jump into the fray, some quick definitions are in order. Like any semi-organized community, night clubs have their own specialized lexicon of words and phrases that make sense only when you've been inside one of these places for an appropriate length of time. Exempli Gratia:

"Table"
Used as a verb in most cases to mean that you are paying for an hour of a girl's time. As the word implies, she will sit and have a drink with you at your table. In taglish, one would say, "Itatable ko sya" or "Limang oras ko sya tinable, pota." The way each club handles this particular process is slightly different. The classical method involves buying one ladies' drink per hour, at a cost of about PhP500.00 or so. (More on this in subsequent entries.)

"Showroom"
Each club has a slightly different way of handling how a guest goes about choosing a girl to table. The most common form is having all the available girls sit in an aquarium-like room, which guests can view from the outside. The quality of the showroom (not just the girls, but the furniture and lighting they use) is your first sign of the overall quality of the club, so you need to pay attention when the F.M. escorts you to this area.

"F.M."
Floor Manager, although sometimes they call this person the "G.R.M." or "Guest Relations Manager." FMs will usually send regular guests friendly texts every now and then informing them of club events or whatnot. Most of them will hand you a business card if you look halfway-decent on your first visit to their club.

Because the FMs are the ambassadors of a given club, the security will usually ask you who your FM is when you first step inside. If you don't have one yet (which implies that it's your first time there), you will probably be asked to comply with other security measures like leaving your cellphone at the door, or placing a bit of tape over its camera lenses. Otherwise, your regular FM will meet you at the door and escort you to a table.

"Area"
Most of the clubs I've been to follow the standard floor-show format, with tables and couches laid out around an elevated stage. A dancer who is currently on the stage may at times step down and approach one of the guests. "Area" is what they call that particular act, usage thusly: "Pina-area ko yung barkada ko sa kanya" or "Sabay-sabay sila nag-area nung nakita nila yung mga kano."

"GRO/Model/Solo"
As in other occupations, experience and skillset usually mean better pay and more benefits. So too in the world of girlie bars. A girl who has just started working at a bar is usually given GRO status. She makes less money when tabled, and does not go on stage much, if at all. Models are the next step up: they cost a hundred pesos more (roughly) to table than the GROs. You usually see models on-stage in groups, i.e., they do not have enough experience to dominate that stage by themselves. Solo performers represent the top of the food chain, often costing nearly twice as much as a GRO. Most solos will remove their tops while on stage, with about 50% of them going "all the way." Some solos have special tricks involving beer bottles or cigarettes. (I tend to stay well away from the stage when one of these types come on, as they usually give the beer bottle or cigarette to the closest guest after they're done with it. Yuck.)

None of these girls will ever give you their real names when you first meet them. If they don't like you, you may never find out what it is.

"Bar Fine"
Because a girlie bar is a business that must obey the same rules of profit and loss as any other company, the management usually discourages their girls from leaving the venue with their guests during business hours (generally 8pm to 4am). Particularly horny/wealthy guests who simply must have at it are made to pay a "bar fine" amounting to the maximum income that that girl represents for one night. Usually this starts at about PhP3,500, but it depends greatly on what kind of deal you can haggle for with an FM. (I've personally seen some girls asking for Php10,000 up front.)

"Gimmick" ... or probably, "Gimik"
Fornication for a fee. This colloquialism is a bastardization of a bastardization, with the regular pedestrian version meaning simply an outing or an activity. (The standard English meaning has nothing to do with either versions.) Be careful how you use this word in front of bargirls -- they will interpret your words differently.

"VIP"
Although not all clubs have floor shows, all of them will have private rooms that you can rent once you have chosen a girl to hang with. All of these rooms are called "VIP," even though some rooms are decidedly more "important" than others. Nearly all clubs will have a working KTV in their VIP rooms, with a long couch and a low table. (No beds here, as these rooms are not usually meant for fucking.)